My behaviors, outlooks, and attitudes have had a complete 180-degree shift. When I entered
this house I can remember thinking that I will do what I need to in order to just get through it
and viewed this situation as something that was pretty terrible. Yet, as time went on and as I
grew to not look at this house as something that I had to do, but more as something that I got
to do and had the privilege of being here, that’s when it all started to shift for me. I did not
approach each and every day as something I was fed up with and really tried to be more
optimistic, because if you wake up every day telling yourself this is going to suck, the chances of
that being the case are extremely high. This house has taught me that accountability is one of,
if not the most important thing in sobriety, and it is not so much about holding others to that
like we do in this house, but more about holding yourself accountable and being able to say “I
messed up” and then going out to make it right. Just because we get sober does not mean that
all is going to be well and good at all times and sometimes you are going to hear things that you
do not want to and now you have to deal with it in a sober frame of mind rather than running
and hiding from controversy. We learn to deal with it like men and not try to skate around
everything and use it which inevitably only makes matters worse. I have really begun to
do every single thing with much more effort and authenticity and this was not me when I was
drinking. Anything moderate or decent was okay with me and even then it was below average
because my standards were not very high. However, now with all of the work that I have put in
and that I will need to continue to put in, it has shifted to where I want to try to make every
single thing that I do superior and to the best of my ability! My attitude about life, in general,
has really transformed from a pessimistic outlook to an optimistic one and I try to attack each
and every day as if I am on “borrowed time” because when I was found in my apartment prior
to coming here – I had pancreatitis and bottles lying about everywhere; I was on the brink of
doing some irreversible damage and possibly even death. Life is very precious and I ultimately
the only reason that I have one is that I do not have a bottle in my hand or and I have a
lifestyle that was been given to me with the help of this house.
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