OUR FAMILY’S JOURNEY
On February 5, 2013 I began my journey into emotional sobriety. I was beaten down by the horrible, cunning, baffling and powerful disease of alcohol and drugs. I had been in the program of AA and Al-Anon before but had not completely gotten honest with myself. When I was pregnant with my second child in 1994 I admitted I was alcoholic, but as soon as I gave birth I decided that was just hormonal emotions talking and that I was fine. I guess I wasn’t finished making my story. Even after being arrested for possible DUI in 2010, I convinced myself that I wasn’t drunk I was just in a hurry to get home. I was able to get out of the charge by serving community service and meeting with a probation officer for 12 months. I even convinced my probation officer that I should go to Al-anon instead of AA. I wasn’t the one with the problem! This is a disease of lies. Flash -forward to February of 2013; my Al-anon sponsor suggested that I go to some open AA meetings (I think she suspected I was one of them). It wasn’t until April 16, 2013 that I finally had the courage to walk into the AA room and say, Hi, I’m Becky and I’m an alcoholic. I was skeptical but deep down I knew I had a problem. The woman sitting next to me suggested that I read the first page of PART II (it doesn’t have a page number) of the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, “They realized that repeated lack of drinking control, when they really wanted control, was the fatal symptom that spelled problem drinking. This, plus mounting emotional disturbances, convinced them that compulsive alcoholism already had them; that complete ruin would be only a question of time.” Boy howdy, did that ever hit home. I finally let go absolutely and began working the steps. A huge weight was lifted off my shoulders when I began focusing on my own recovery and quit playing GOD!!! The Al-Anon room started working when I got honest and was willing to do whatever it took to stay sober. I started taking care of myself by not accepting unacceptable behavior. My oldest son, JJ, was back at home using heavy drugs and my husband was drinking but I was remaining sober thanks to AA and Al-Anon. It was a struggle but I kept going to meetings, working the steps with my sponsor and reading daily from the literature of the programs. I began to have courage. Horrible events were happening all around me – numerous 911 calls, JJ’s best friend fatally overdosing on heroin, fights between siblings and fights with my husband. The final 911 call lead to my husband’s arrest and JJ leaving the house with an old girlfriend that appeared in our yard like an angel. She agreed to take him away. When Jay was released from jail (he had detoxed in solitary confinement), he immediately went to a meeting at our home group and has not had a drink since. My husband and I decided to legally evict JJ from the house and we gave him an ultimatum: you either go to a rehab facility, or live on the streets. One of the AA promises is that we intuitively know how to handle situations that used to baffle us. We gave him two nights in a hotel to give him time to figure out what he would do. In the mean time, I googled a rehab center in Sacramento CA. We put JJ on a Greyhound bus with a suitcase of clothes. Although he told us that he was able to use in the rehab center, a sobriety seed was planted and from there he found a sober living house in LA. He moved in and shortly after got a nightshift job at Home Depot, which lead to a little drug use. My son did not have the structure and discipline he needed to get sober. Someone from the house had a connection with The Last House and said it had more structure where he would be held accountable. Luckily (I believe it was a God thing) JJ was able to get right in!
Words cannot explain how grateful I am for this sober living program. I love the name, The Last House, because it truly is… The Last House! The dedicated staff and the way it is run WORKS!!!!!! This is a family disease and I am so grateful that I was called by a staff member on a regular basis to fill me in on the progression of our son’s recovery . While my husband and I were home working on our journey of a new way of life, it was so comforting to know that our son was learning how to live life on life’s terms as well. In October of last year we visited JJ at The Last House and were able to meet the staff and tour the house. The house manager was so kind as to suggest places in town to sight see and we were able to sit down with the house director, Andy, and visit. There were a couple of things I wanted to do on our visit. See the Hollywood sign and watch the sun go down from the Santa Monica Pier. Guess what? JJ took me to do both! Our family has healed and I will forever be grateful for this wonderful program that The Last House has offered us! As the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous says, “No situation is too difficult and no unhappiness too great to be overcome.” This month, I am proud and so very grateful to say JJ has graduated from The Last House. I never will forget the phone call I got just a few weeks ago from JJ. He called to tell me he was graduating in a week. I heard sniffles in the background and I said, “are you ok?” and JJ said with a tearful voice, “ I did it, mom. I can’t believe I actually finished something for the first time in my life”.
THANK YOU, LAST HOUSE. MY FAMILY IS FINALLY HEALTHY!!!!!!!
– Becky K