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Bipolar Disorder and Substance Abuse

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It is very common for those who struggle with substance abuse to also struggle with an additional mental illness or disorder. One of the more common dual diagnoses with Substance Abuse is Bipolar Disorder.  More than half of those seeking treatment for Bipolar Disorder are also in treatment for substance abuse.

 

It’s important to understand Bipolar Disorder, identify it and treat it affectively. Of course, life is full of ups and down and part of being human is experiencing a range of emotions. However, Bipolar Disorder (a.k.a Manic Depressive Disorder) is characterized by extreme and unusual shifts in mood, emotion, and productiveness.

 

Bipolar Disorder is a brain disorder about 3 percent of the U.S. population have. This mental illness usually surfaces in adolescence and in early adulthood and is a lifelong illness. Similar to substance abuse treatment, Bipolar Disorder must be carefully treated and supported throughout a person’s life.

 

Diagnosing someone with Bipolar Disorder can be complicated. Many times, people will be diagnosed with something like Depression before getting properly diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder. This delay in diagnosis can postpone or prevent treatment.

Studies show that about 60% of those with Bipolar Disorder will abuse drugs or alcohol. If Substance Abuse goes untreated, it makes the road to recovery from Bipolar nearly impossible. When someone abuses drugs and/or alcohol, it affects mood and behavior which can also mimic symptoms of Bipolar Disorder. This is why detoxing from substances is an imperative piece in the beginning stages of treatment.

Thrive Treatment Center understands how crucial it is to provide a safe and superlative detox in order for treatment to be successful and long term. Once someone with substance abuse has fully detoxed, highly qualified psychiatrists and therapists can accurately diagnose patients.

The following characteristics could be symptoms of Bipolar Disorder and or Substance Abuse:

Sudden mood change.

Periods of unusual personality change like hyperactivity, agitation, or giddiness.

Significantly decreased need for sleep.

Racing speech, flight of ideas, impulsiveness.

Poor financial choices.

Difficulty sleeping; early-morning awakening

There are many other symptoms of Bipolar Disorder and Substance Abuse.

Having a Dual Diagnosis of Bipolar Disorder and Substance Abuse can make treatment more difficult. In order to provide ample treatment, substance abuse treatment should occur at the same time as Bipolar Disorder treatment and in the same program.

Some of the treatment plans offered include medications and different forms of therapy. The most successful therapy modalities used are Motivational Interviewing, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Solution-Focused Therapy and Trauma Therapies.

Recovering from Bipolar Disorder and Substance Abuse is very possible and treatment is effective! Thrive Treatment Centers are a great place to recover and staff can guide clients to the road of recovery from Bipolar Disorder and Substance Abuse.

 

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Anger Management

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Anger Management

by Claire Godden

“I don’t need anger management. I need everyone else to stop pissing me off”

The topic of Anger Management during recovery must not be overlooked. An addict may be using substances to control or mask anger or to numb feelings in general. But numbing and, therefore, avoiding the feeling means you will never break the cycle of anger, reactive outburst, negative consequence and subsequent fallout. Anger unchecked will destroy your relationships and your health. Handled constructively however, you can build your sense of self-worth and greatly improve relationships with others. Anger is a normal, healthy, human emotion and you absolutely can learn to manage it. The reality is that your reaction to events around you is yours and your alone.

Results of Anger

Why should you control your anger anyway? Shouldn’t you be free to express yourself?

Outbursts of anger will lead to others fearing and avoiding you. You could permanently lose important relationships or even your job. All of this in turn can lead to guilt and anxiety, both of which can lead to, or worsen, depression. Physical symptoms such as heart palpitations, headaches, and fatigue can also occur. Anger weakens your immune system. Even worse, you are putting yourself at higher risk for a stroke and heart disease.

 

“He who angers you conquers you” – Elizabeth Kenny

 

So, where to start? First, learn what triggers your anger

Anger exists because of frustration, pain, or fear. You may also be turning anger at yourself outward and blaming everyone else for things that don’t go your way. You’re frustrated because you procrastinated about job-seeking or writing an essay for college. Someone is not listening to you or doing things the way you would like them to. Your computer won’t work properly and you can’t figure out why. You feel that someone has disrespected you. You are afraid someone is deserting you or cheating on you. You’re sick and tired of your co-worker’s attitude. Your parents are asking you to do things you don’t want to do. The list can go on and on. It may take you time to practice not reacting the way you always have to situations you don’t like, but it can be done.

 

Emotional Intelligence

Emotional Intelligence (EI) is about being aware of your own emotions and learning to regulate those emotions and your behavior. It is also about practicing helping others regulate their behavior and being able to read and interpret others’ emotions. EI also looks at awareness of how different social interactions affect you and how you affect the mood of any social interaction whether individual or group. You can build your emotional intelligence by paying close attention to people’s verbal responses, body language and mood when you are around them. Learn to really listen to the other person and don’t interrupt. Listen without judgement. Put yourself in their shoes and be empathetic by tuning into the other person’s feelings, thoughts and attitudes. Practice being humble. You don’t need to seek accolades for a job well done or brag about it to others. Practice being quietly confident in whatever you have achieved. The results will speak for themselves in time. Increasing your emotional intelligence will help you achieve a calmer, less frustrated existence.

 

Alternatives to anger and things you can do to be more calm in general

It is possible to deal with anger in a constructive way. You do not need to deny that people or situations make you angry. Acknowledging that they do so but quickly stopping that urge to react immediately is key to anger management.

 

*Replay an incident in your mind where your anger was out of control. Think about the effects of your emotions on the other person or people and think about how you could have handled it differently. If you re-write the script with constructive action or a calmer reaction on your part, how does it change the other person’s responses? How does it change the aftermath? Do this regularly later on in the day after an angry outburst and you will train yourself to react less aggressively and more logically.

 

*Take up a hobby that induces calm and that you can practice regularly. Art, writing, yoga, music, gardening, cooking, reading, You may find that you can go to this calm place in your mind when you feel angry outbursts coming on.

 

*Exercise. If you don’t currently exercise, start with something you can easily incorporate into your daily routine. Maybe just walking the dog at a good pace or jogging around the block. Exercise relieves stress and anything is better than nothing. If you make your goal unattainable, you will likely cause more frustration when you find that you cannot keep it up. Twenty minutes walking the dog is 20 minutes that you weren’t sitting watching TV or fuming over something that happened that day.

 

*Sleep. We all know that getting enough sleep is good for us. Make sure your room is dark with no distracting lights and no TV on all night. Trying reading before you sleep but not on electronic devices as the light promotes wakefulness making the brain think it’s daytime. Try to keep a regular bedtime, too.

 

*Avoid certain people if necessary. Avoidance doesn’t work for the long-term, of course, but you may find it helpful to avoid certain people while you are practicing managing your anger.

 

*Don’t expect things to change overnight. Just as it took you time to learn to react this way, it can take time to unlearn and re-learn.

 

*Thinking more positively in general. Try to be more aware of your thoughts in general. Do you find your self-talk to be on the negative side? Do you think the worst of people. Is everyone out to get you? Turning around those thoughts that don’t necessarily lead to angry outbursts can instill a steady sense of well-being and can help reduce your feelings of hostility to others in general.

 

As you reduce and eventually stop having angry outbursts, you will find that you earn more respect from others, develop a stronger sense of self-worth, and feel better physically. You will project calm, control, and confidence to those you interact with.

 

“You cannot shake hands with a clenched fist” – Indira Gandhi

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Anxiety Disorder and Substance Abuse

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Anxiety Disorder and Substance Abuse is more common then you would expect.  Experiencing anxiety in life is inevitable. But it’s not all bad. Anxiety is a survival skill. In fact, anxiety played an important role in ancient humans. Thousands of years ago, when Homo Sapiens inhabited the earth, anxiety was used when taking action during immediate danger and problems. For example, a lion may appear in the plains and anxiety would be used to run and find safety.

Today, anxiety is still used as a tool. It can help motivate you to accomplish your assignments, to work hard, and to be cautious in various environments.

However, anxiety and anxiety disorder are different things. Anxiety disorder involves excessive worrying and fears that are intense, may last for long periods of time, and is impairing to areas of life.

Although there are different types of anxiety disorders with specific symptoms, they all have these same general symptoms, which include panic, fear or uneasiness, sleeping difficulties, difficulty staying still, cold, sweaty and numb extremities, trouble breathing, heart murmurs, stomach discomfort, muscle tension and dizziness.

There isn’t one initial cause for anxiety disorder. In reality, it’s more of a combination of biological dispositions/ genetic makeup and trauma/ environmental stress.

The five major types of anxiety disorders include generalized anxiety disorder, obsessive-compulsive disorder, panic disorder, post-traumatic stress disorder, and social phobia. Although these mental illnesses are similar and all fall under the anxiety disorder umbrella, they do have differences in treatments and symptoms.

Although anxiety disorder can affect anyone, women and non-Hispanic whites are more likely to experience this mental illness.

Anxiety disorders are the most common mental illnesses in the U.S. but less than 43% actually seek treatment. There are many reasons as to why people with anxiety disorder do not seek treatment. For example, mental health stigma can contribute to not seeking treatment out of shame or embarrassment. Another reason being that many people with anxiety disorder may lack insight, awareness or the tools to seek treatment.  People with anxiety disorder and substance abuse need to seek treatment.

 

It’s not uncommon for those with substance abuse problems to also suffer from one or more psychiatric disorders, like anxiety disorder. Many studies show that those diagnosed with either substance abuse or anxiety disorder are at an increased risk for developing the other. Both illnesses work together to exacerbate the illnesses symptoms.

Fortunately, anxiety disorder and substance abuse is treatable with psychotherapy, medication, mindfulness and overall health!

I’ve personally struggled with anxiety disorder and substance abuse since before I can remember. It wasn’t until I began treatment for an eating disorder ten years ago, that I realized how long I had been struggling and how I didn’t see it because it was my norm. This made me realize how possible it is for those with anxiety disorder to go their whole lives without seeking treatment, even if they experience impairments.

It was terrifying seeking treatment for many reasons. For one, I was young and not many people my age around me were openly struggling with addiction and mental illness. Two, my family and the culture I grew up in reinforced a mental health stigma, making it shameful for me to be vulnerable and ask for help. Three, treatment is expensive. By the time I was nineteen, I was working three jobs to help pay for individual therapy, eating disorder anonymous meetings, nutritionists, group therapy, etc. Although, I had barriers to recovery, I did have enough support and privilege to keep me going.

Along my recovery I was diagnosed with OCD, panic disorder and generalized anxiety disorder. Once I began taking medication, educating myself more on these illnesses, exercising, while still going to various forms of therapy, I felt my recovery reached a new level of redemption.

I still struggle and still have anxiety disorder symptoms and still have eating disorder tendencies, but my recovery is the most important thing to me and being on this path feels so much more cathartic and meaningful than being imprisoned by unhealthy habits.

Thrive Treatments Intensive Outpatient programs can make it possible for you to succeed, no matter what barriers may be present. They have a strong emphasis on affordable recovery because everyone deserves to recover and to receive the upmost care. At Thrive, staff work to empower individuals to become their own recovery advocates and give you the tools necessary build a successful and personalized road to recovery.  We treat those struggling with anxiety disorder and substance abuse.  The Last House offers a safe and stable environment for those struggling with addiction to get clean and sober.

 

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ADHD in Recovery

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Managing ADHD in Recovery

ADHD (Attention-Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder) is one of the numerous psychiatric disorders I have encountered. Through these encounters I have seen the impact that this disorder has on someone’s mental well being and those around them.

Managing ADHD is hard enough on its own and throwing recovery into the mix can be a lot to handle.

Whether you have ADHD in recovery, struggle with ADHD alone or perhaps you know someone seeking sobriety with ADHD, it’s important to understand what this disorder is and how it impacts individuals and loved ones.

ADHD is one of the most common mental disorders and is described as difficulty with sitting still, trouble focusing, being messy and disorganized, being easily distracted or forgetful, and being impulsive.

The impacts alone of ADHD are significant in those diagnosed and those around them. ADHD can negatively affect education, employment, relationships, finances and quality of life. Likewise, addiction and substance abuse can negatively affect those same areas.

Many times those with addictions also struggle with mental disorders like ADHD and there is an additional risk for substance abuse in someone diagnosed with ADHD. There are various reasons that those with ADHD are more susceptible to addiction, one of them being that people with ADHD become hooked on other substances as a means of coping with the symptoms that ADHD present.

It can be hard to manage ADHD symptoms and recover at the same time. However, Thrive Treatment Center has expert staff that provide treatment for dual diagnoses. At Thrive, experts focus on treatment of both addiction and ADHD simultaneously. The treatment programs focus on modifying destructive thoughts and behaviors with therapies like DBT and CBT, building self esteem and motivation through trauma-focused therapy, controlling symptoms and identifying triggers with Mindfulness modalities and educating loved ones through family therapy.

If you or a loved one is struggling with substance abuse and ADHD, please call Thrive for help and for additional resources.

It is also advised that those struggling with addiction consider a sober living environment.  The Last House Sober Living in Los Angeles is a highly structured sober living and is a great place for those struggling with ADHD to recover.

 

“The greatest glory in living lies not in never failing, but in rising every time we fail.”– Nelson Mandela

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Dual Diagnosis Treatment

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Dual Diagnosis Treatment

What is Dual Diagnosis

Dual diagnosis, aka co-occurring disorders, is a term used for individuals who struggle with both a mental disorder and alcohol or drug abuse. With dual diagnosis, either disorder can begin to appear first. People who struggle with a mental health condition will sometimes turn to drugs and/or alcohol as a form of self-medication. In turn, people who have an alcohol or drug dependency can worsen the effects of an underlying mental health condition.

If somebody is diagnosed with co-occurring disorders, they need to treat both conditions with each illness requiring a treatment plan of its own. If a treatment is going to be effective, the person needs to quit using alcohol or drugs. Finding the kind of integrated care necessary to overcome dual diagnosis can be challenging due to the completely different cultures of the mental health and substance recovery fields.

Symptoms of dual diagnosis are unique

The signs and symptoms of dual diagnosis will vary based on the type of mental disorder that is diagnosed and the drug of choice that accompanies it. To help you better understand, let’s say you know somebody who is struggling with alcohol abuse and bipolar disorder, the symptoms here will be different than those of an individual who is struggling with a heroin addiction and depression. The one thing that most dual diagnosis patients have in common is that they find it incredibly difficult to cope with their disorders and function on a day-to-day basis. Most often people with dual diagnosis struggle with:

  • Unemployment or an inability to maintain a job
  • Poverty
  • Maintaining a functional relationship
  • Chronic health complications
  • Legal issues
  • Mood swings and uncontrollable emotions

If you didn’t already know, your loved one’s personal struggles will make it nearly impossible to depend on them. They may have episodes during family gatherings, be unable to take care of themselves and hinder their family’s ability to live a normal life. When the drug problems and emotional issues of your loved one begin to affect other people in the family, it is time to seek out treatment.

How to Treat Dual Diagnosis?

Integrated intervention is one of the best ways to treat dual diagnosis effectively. Integrated intervention is when an individual is treated for both their mental illness and drug addiction. In the 1990’s, patients were refused to be treated for their mental illness until they were able to conquer their drinking problem. This way of thinking is outdated to say the least, and doctors know that to cure a patient, effectively, both issues need to be addressed.

You and your treatment provider should work together so you both understand how each condition affects the other and how to make the treatment as effective as possible. Everyone will need their own unique treatment plan, but here are some common methods used today:

Detoxification – Detox is one of the first major hurdles for somebody with dual diagnosis. As you might expect, inpatient detox is typically more effective than outpatient as far as safety and sobriety. When a patient goes the route of inpatient detox, they are monitored at all times by a trained staff member; this can last for up to seven days. In some cases, the staff member will attempt to wean a person off the substance by administering tapering amounts to lessen the impact of withdrawal.

Inpatient Rehab – Inpatient rehabilitation is often the best treatment for somebody experiencing a mental disorder and showing patterns of drug dependency. With inpatient rehabilitation, they can receive medical and mental health care around the clock. A good treatment center will provide medication, support and therapy to help treat an individual suffering from dual diagnosis.  Intensive Outpatient Programs can also be a very effective treatment for addiction.  Thrive Treatment is a IOP program with great ratings.

Sober Living – Essentially the same thing as a group home or sober house, a residential treatment center whose main objective is to help the newly sober avoid relapse. Since these homes are often not run by a licensed professional, the level of quality care will vary. Many of these homes have been criticized, so do your research before you choose one.  The Last House is a great example of a highly reviewed sober living that works.

Psychotherapy – This can be a big part of treating a dual diagnosis patient effectively. More specifically, cognitive behavioral therapy teaches people how to cope with and alter ineffective thinking patterns.

Self-help & Support Groups – The feeling of dual diagnosis is one that is challenging and isolating. In support groups, members can share frustrations and celebrate achievements. People with dual diagnosis can find others with the same affliction and receive referrals for specialists as well as recovery tips from peers. In a support group, everybody has the same goal: to get better. This kind of setting will provide individuals with a clean space that can support the growth of healthy relationships.

Receiving the treatment you or your loved one needs to cope with dual diagnosis can be difficult. Most rehabilitation facilities work with a variety of addictive behaviors, but don’t usually provide the necessary treatment for the underlying mental disorders. Traditionally, substance abuse and mental disorders have always been treated separately. Recently, addiction experts noticed the importance of integrating the treatment of substance abuse and mental disorders to form a single recovery program. The treatment of dual diagnosis should be its own discipline, combining components of substance abuse treatment with the best practices in psychiatric care.

If one of the two dual diagnosis disorders is left untreated, both will usually get worse. The combination of two separate disorders can lead to a poor response to treatments and an increased risk of other serious medical complications.

If you or a loved one is suffering from dual diagnosis, they’re not alone. Based on a national survey on drug use and health, more than eight-million people in the U.S. alone suffer from mental disorder and substance abuse simultaneously. Admitting that there is a problem is the first and most important step towards recovery. The next step is to get you or your loved one the quality care they need to get better.

Los Angeles Sober Living

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The Last House – Los Angeles Sober Living

The Last House los angeles sober living is a structured sober living recovery home community located in the heart of West Los Angeles. The Last House mission is to provide a safe, fun, program-oriented

setting where residents can find purpose, progress, and build a foundation for a life that is not only free of drugs and alcohol, but flourishing in all aspects.  The Last House sober livings staff consist of active members of the Los Angeles recovery community and come with years of experience, professional backgrounds, counseling certifications and various expertise in health, wellness and employment services.

Through The Last House program, residents gain access to one of the largest recovery networks in North America; the L.A. recovery community.  The men that join our program receive the tools one needs to launch as a self-sufficient, self-reliant, self-motivated individual with a close peer group in the houses that they can rely on to go through a part of life that may be difficult, yet if committed to, a transformitive opportunity.

The Last House prides itself on the residents of past that have graduated the program, giving back to the community and our newest residents, and considering our program as a safe place to ground them. This image taken with many of our residents and graduates, represents what we stand for: unity, support and recreating a life worth living. This may not be the first place you’ve been, but it can be The Last House you need to go.

The Last House also runs an intensive outpatient drug treatment facility that provides a higher level of care, Thrive Treatment.

Thrive Treatment begins by creating outpatient drug treatment that is accessible and well-structured for clients to safely make mistakes and learn new skills. The treatment team has over 30 years of combined clinical expertise, models respect and integrity, while offering everyday tools to make better choices to stay clean and sober through evidenced-based clinical approaches like DBT, CBT, Trauma-focused and Mindfulness modalities. Thrive Treatment upholds the nuts and bolts of life like accountability, values, life skills, boundaries, trust and responsibility to help clients learn to manage sobriety and the anxiety that comes along with living life sober. Thrive helps to process and discard the self-defeating stories and behaviors that keep people stuck. Thrive has also built a community of people who are in it with the client’s families and loved ones for the long-haul. Thrive Treatment prides itself on keeping clients connected to their new community long after completion of treatment and are invested in helping them find purpose beyond sobriety.
The founder of Thrive Outpatient Treatment collected some of addiction treatment’s most respected and successful clinicians who authentically share a passion for helping others flourish and believe in the same key ingredients to long-term recovery success: values, accountability, life skills, and having fun in recovery.
Thrive is a close-knit treatment family and takes a compassionate, but no-fluff approach. The Thrive treatment team understands first-hand how hard it is for those who struggle with addiction. Integrity is most important to Thrive. It’s that simple at Thrive Treatment.
Visit Thrive

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A Place for Mindfulness

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A Place for Mindfulness
by Claire Godden

When you eat your lunch, are you also on your phone scrolling through the news or social media? Do

you even remember what you eat each day? The simple practice of slowing down, savoring every bite and being aware of the taste, smell, and texture of our food, is a small and easy step toward becoming more mindful.

But what is the point of being mindful? Well, first, let’s look at the definition:

Mindfulness is defined as the quality or state of being conscious or aware of something while accepting, without judgment, whatever thoughts, sensations, and emotions arise

Examples of mindfulness techniques

To begin with, we can look at the example above. When you sit down to eat any meal or snack, put your phone away, turn off the TV, or take the meal outside of your office and away from your desk to somewhere quieter. Before you eat anything, take note of why you are eating. Are you really hungry or are you eating because you’re bored or trying to take your mind off of something else? Maybe you have to eat now as it’s your only chance, time-wise, to do so. As you begin to eat, notice the food’s color, smell, taste, and texture. Chew each bite fully before taking the next. Think about where the food came from and how it was made. Think about whether or not it is good for you. If you begin to think about the grocery shopping you need to do tomorrow, acknowledge the thought and then bring your focus back to the food and the present moment. As you get more practiced, you will not need to always move somewhere quiet and you will even be able to eat mindfully while at social gatherings.

So why should we bother?

The benefits of mindfulness are many and include improvements in mental and physical health and in overall well being. Also, as you practice mindfulness, you will begin to truly acknowledge the present and, in doing so, develop a sense of calm and control over your life. The best part is, it is not complicated and it doesn’t require a lot of time. It just requires a commitment to practice it daily to see the benefits.

How does this fit with addiction?

One of our clients graduated today and said at our community group meeting that part of his recovery was learning to not only appreciate, but also be ok with, the present moment. He spoke of how, before treatment, he tried to avoid and deny negative and uncomfortable feelings. Now, he says he is able to accept and face the not-so-positive feelings and sensations when they arise. Recovery requires honesty and doesn’t allow for running away from anything. It requires the ability to respond in a less reactive way to things that you don’t like. In this aspect, mindfulness is a wonderful tool and one that can be used for life.

Being completely conscious of what we are feeling in the present moment might not be calming at all at first and can be incredibly uncomfortable and disconcerting for some. With practice, however, mindfulness can bring us a sense of control over our emotions, our thoughts, and the sensations within our body. Bringing our focus to only the present means we are not avoiding anything but are, instead, fully able to address things. Mindfulness is honest and real.

As you become more practiced at being not only aware of but also comfortable in your present moment, you can find yourself more able to deal with cravings and the uncomfortable thoughts that accompany them. Instead of automatically reaching for your drug of choice, you can feel more armed and ready to address the sensations and thoughts that lead you to the drug use. Skillful and intentional responses can replace automatic and previously learned reactions.
To explore this further, you may want to look at Mindfulness-Based Relapse Prevention (MBRP). MBRP is a relatively new treatment modeled on the already well-established Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy. The difference is that MBRP focuses on negative emotions and cravings and on a person’s reactions and impulsive behavior. Mindfulness, remember, is the quality or state of being conscious or aware of something. MBRP helps the person have more confidence and strength when facing feelings of self-judgment and negativity. If you would like to read further, Carolyn Gregoire has written a very interesting and informative article on MBRP.

Dealing with negative thoughts

By practicing mindfulness regularly with something simple like eating your lunch or taking a shower, you can hone your concentration skills. As you get better at being calm and focused while performing these everyday tasks, you will be ready to practice mindfulness at other times, such as when things around you are more chaotic or negative. As you tune in to your inner thoughts, negative feelings, such as shame or guilt around your addiction, may arise. You don’t need to fight off unwanted thoughts or sensations but, instead, acknowledge them honestly in the here and now. Ask yourself if the content of the negative thought is really true. Question where it is coming from and try to replace it with something more positive. A good therapist can really help you in this area if you are having difficulty.

Anyone can do it!

Life is busy. Of course, we cannot spend our whole day in a state of intense concentration and acknowledgment. But that is precisely why we benefit so much from the minutes that we do spend being mindful. Mindfulness is a relaxed state where you will focus on current, inner thoughts and physical sensations completely free of self-judgment. You do not have to be wearing yoga pants and sitting cross-legged to practice mindfulness! Although, if you can spend 30 minutes each day being mindful in peace and quiet on a yoga mat, even better! Mindful minutes can be taken on a five-minute walk outside of the office. A few minutes spent practicing mindfulness in your car before you head home from work can provide a healthy transition between work and home. Even taking a few minutes before bed to sit and focus only on how you feel in the present, not your day at work, not tomorrow, but how you feel right now, can do wonders for your mental, emotional, and physical health.

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HOW To Fix Your Problem

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As a psychotherapist here in Los Angeles I often have clients who come to me seeking help for a wide variety of life problems and personal difficulties. This Article is intended to help your problem. Anxiety, depression, financial insecurity, drug addiction and marital problems are just a few of the issues that I see people struggling with. Often, by simply revealing and discussing their issues with me these clients start to see a reduction in their difficulties, such as less anxiety, improvements in both their mood and their relationships, less struggle with their addictions, and more. But sometimes the problems don’t seem to get better and I often see that what is needed is a deeper commitment to making changes in one’s life and the willingness to take action. Those who can acknowledge their problems, can be open-minded towards trying something new and who are willing to commit and take action invariably begin to feel better and function more efficiently in their lives. I am continually amazed at how quickly and successfully people start to heal mentally, physically and emotionally.

This has lead me to often ponder the question: What are the factors that lead to growth and healing in people and a reduction of their problems? What I’ve found is that a person must exhibit three qualities for real and deep change to occur in them. Those three factors are reflected in the acronym HOW: Honesty, Open-mindedness and Willingness. *(I must confess that I in no way originated this idea. These three factors are often mentioned in the 12 step recovery programs and appear in the book Alcoholics Anonymous, also known as The Big Book.)

In this blog post I would like to explore these three qualities and discuss how they are essential in helping people overcome their difficulties in life.

 

“Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored.”

― Aldous Huxley

 

Let’s begin with the first letter, H, i.e. Honesty. Since we were children we’ve heard idioms such as “Honesty is the best policy” and “honest to goodness” and it is my belief that most people believe that honesty is better than dishonesty. Such things as lying, cheating, stealing and slander are all forms of dishonesty that without fail have negative consequences for a person who engages in them. But in the context of overcoming personal life problems honesty can be looked at in a particular way. Unless a person is able to acknowledge that a problem exists, i.e. admit to themselves and to another person that they have the problem, very little attention or help will be directed towards the problem and thus rarely occurs. Another way to state this is that often people are in denial that a problem exists, or they minimize the severity of the problem to themselves or others.

The need for honestly admitting one’s issues in order to be able to change and overcome life problems is nicely encapsulated in the book Alcoholics Anonymous at the beginning of the Fifth Chapter “How It Works”. “

“Rarely have we seen a person fail who has thoroughly followed our path. Those who do not recover are people who cannot or will not completely give themselves to this simple program, usually men and women who are constitutionally incapable of being honest with themselves. There are such unfortunates. They are not at fault; they seem to have been born that way. They are naturally incapable of grasping and developing a manner of living which demands rigorous honesty. Their chances are less than average.There are those, too, who suffer from grave emotional and mental disorders, but many of them do recover if they have the capacity to be honest.”

I have witnessed this many times my clients. If a person is able to be unflinchingly honest about their problems and can begin to be more honest in all aspects of their life, they invariably begin to feel better and their problems begin to decrease.

 

“A mind is like a parachute. It doesn’t work if it is not open.”

― Frank Zappa

 

I must be clear that Honesty is just the initial factor needed and without the second factor, Open-mindedness, progress will surely begin to falter. One definition of open-minded is a willingness to hear and consider new ideas. (www.yourdictionary.com)

Why is it important to be open to hearing and considering new ideas in order to overcome one’s problems? I might state it simply in this way: It’s difficult to learn anything without having an open mind. And I strongly believe that in order to fix serious life problems a person must learn possible solutions to their problems and be willing to enact those solution.

If a person is open-minded to making changes in their life and for trying new things, they are well on their way to improving their lives and seeing their problems decline. However, many people are resistant to being open-minded. Various factors can contribute to this lack of open-mindedness. Prideful obstinance, denial, trust issues, over reliance on self-will, fear of change, and many other forms of resistance can lead to a person being close minded to hearing and considering new ideas.

I would like to share an example from my own life to highlight the need for open-mindedness. When I was a boy growing up in South Louisiana, I came to believe, by observing the other boys and men around me, that a “man” was not supposed to share his feelings with other people. If a male was sad or upset the societal belief that I tuned into was that they should “suck it up” and “drive on.” I can remember hearing phrases like “boys don’t cry” and “crying is for sissies.”

Looking back I understand now how unhealthy these ideas were for me and the extremely negative consequences that resulted in me as a result. Fearing that any expression of negative feelings would be met with judgement or disdain from other males, I learned to bottle up and bury any feelings of sadness, anxiety, fear, etc. You can probably guess where this headed to. By not “processing” my negative feelings in a healthy manner, over time these normal human experiences such as angst, anxiety, depression, fear, and such became worse and worse. My solution to these issues was to often self-medicate and numb these feelings or avoid them altogether.

Now what does this have to do with open-mindedness? Well, quite simply, I had to learn and practice a new way of engaging with these negative and toxic emotions. It was suggested to me that I start to talk about these feelings with others and to start to get more “vulnerable.” This went against my social conditioning and definitely was outside of my comfort zone. Luckily I was desperate enough to try something new and my road to emotional healing began.

 

“The future depends on what you do today.”

― Mahatma Gandhi

 

The last component in our three part formula HOW is willingness. A definition of willingness that I particularly like is “The quality or state of being prepared to do something; readiness.”  This suggests one’s being willing to take action. And “action” is the key. Without taking some form of action a person, in my experience, will not change. A person can be honest about their problems and open-minded to possible solutions but without taking action in all likelihood no real change will occur. What types of action are we talking about? That depends on the person and their problem. However, for emotional and psychological problems such as anxiety, depression, PTSD, anger and the like, activities such as meditation practice, going to a therapist, prayer, exercise, yoga, EMDR therapy, equine therapy and others have all been shown to have therapeutic benefits for people. But without the action of participating in these activities, they can’t help a person change.

In closing I would like leave you with perhaps my favorite quote of all from the writer and philosopher Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe.

“Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness. Concerning all acts of initiative and creation, there is one elementary truth the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then providence moves too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one’s favor all manner of unforeseen incidents, meetings and material assistance which no man could have dreamed would have come his way. Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it. Begin it now.”

–Charley Allen

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Acceptance in Our Recovery Community

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Loving Recovery Community

A little over a year ago I came into contact with The Last House. I had a major relapse on alcohol while living in Japan and the Japanese asked me to leave the country. I landed in Los Angeles with no plan on how to put my life back together. Someone recommended The Last House sober living facility as a place to start. I was grasping at straws and was willing to give it a try. I was not the typical Last House resident, I’m older than the average and I’m gay. From day one I felt welcome and accepted in this recovery community. The staff and other residents accepted me and seemed genuinely interested in my recovery. The structure of the house helped me start the process of recovery. I attended AA meetings at least once a day, participated in house activities and allowed the structure and process to aid in my healing. The staff and the guys in the program with me kept me accountable for my behavior and provided a safe place for me to struggle with my issues. My age and sexual orientation really made no difference to staff and residents of The Last House, which took a weight I sometimes carry off my chest. Living there gave me the tools I needed to embark on a life of sobriety. I was able to take the experience of The Last House and apply those tools into my daily life. I have been sober since March 10, 2015 and a great credit goes to The Last House.

-Former Resident

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Gratitude Recovery Based Program

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Gratitude Recovery

A Gratitude Recovery Based Program is what is really going to work? That is always the question, isn’t it? If you’re reading this you are looking for that answer. Sad to say that no one has that; not at least in any way that can be guaranteed, marketed or repeated. Still we have to make decisions. We have to try to make the best choice for ourselves and for the people we love. As an addiction professional I can say with true confidence that Sober Living is the best choice for a young person in early recovery.

View The Last House Homepage

The Last House gets Sober Living right. Community, personal accountability, fellowship, honesty, integrity and above all fun in gratitude recovery. The last house cuts through the bells and whistles that generally present a fantasy that isn’t likely to work out for most of the young people I’ve worked with.

Learning how to enjoy life on life’s terms is central aspect of emotional sobriety and this is where the Last House excels. Young men there learn life skills. They cook and clean for themselves and for one another. They talk openly and directly about what they see happening good and bad with their peers. They call each other out for bad choices. They deal with real consequences. It’s a no bullshit kind of place. Staff doesn’t coddle to residents, they keep it real and they make sure clients are moving forward even if it means taking away their iPhones or their car keys.

Most importantly they don’t allow young adults to disappear. After countless sober livings and treatment centers young people in early recovery tend to learn how to fly under the radar and get through their sober living experience without really being challenged or encouraged to change. Unfortunately too many Sober Livings and treatment center allow this to go on.

On the flip side, there is also a lot of camaraderie and fun. Competitive basketball games at the park, group hikes, barbecues at the beach, sober parties that don’t suck. All that stuff makes the tough love go down easier.

As an addiction professional it is often hard to work with clients to initiate real changes only to watch their environment reinforce self destructive behaviors and contradict the principles that we work so hard to develop in early gratitude recovery. When my clients are residents at The Last House I know they are being held accountable.

written by David Pavia LCSW

Contact us via the number 1-866-677-0090 now if you know anyone who is a victim of drug or alcohol abuse. Our knowledgeable and reliable staff will get to you promptly. Visit Our Homepage

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