A Resident at the Last House Sober Living in West Los Angeles playing basketball during a saturday house event.

Why Saturday Events Matter at The Last House: Building Brotherhood Through Sobriety

At The Last House Sober Living in West Los Angeles, we know that sobriety is more than just abstaining from drugs and alcohol. It’s about building a life that feels full, connected, and fun. That’s why every Saturday, we do something different. We get outside. We get active. We laugh together. We make memories. But most importantly, we strengthen the bonds that hold us accountable and keep us moving forward in our recovery. These Saturday events aren’t just an afterthought or a bonus—they’re a core part of the treatment experience we offer our residents. They give structure, purpose, and joy to the weekend, a time that can otherwise feel unstructured or triggering during early recovery.

Each week, one of the guys is responsible for planning the event. This keeps everyone involved and invested. It encourages leadership, creativity, and participation. Sometimes the event is high energy, like a basketball game or a competitive pickleball match. Other times, it’s more laid back, like a beach day in Santa Monica or watching a UFC fight as a house. No matter what the activity is, the goal is the same: to enjoy life sober, to build trust, and to create community. That’s what sets The Last House apart from other Los Angeles sober living homes. We believe that treatment doesn’t end with therapy sessions—it lives in the real world, in these moments of connection and shared experience.

Many of our Saturday events take place in and around the neighborhoods of West Los Angeles. Whether we’re exploring a museum downtown, hiking in Malibu, mini golfing in Sherman Oaks, or hosting a backyard barbecue at the house, the city becomes a playground for sober living. Los Angeles is filled with opportunities for fun that don’t require substance use, and part of our mission is to reintroduce our residents to these kinds of experiences. When you remove drugs and alcohol from your life, there’s a fear that you’ll never have fun again. But we prove that wrong every weekend.

Planning and leading the Saturday event is also a chance for residents to step into a new level of responsibility. For guys who have been living in chaos or isolation, it’s powerful to take ownership of something that brings people together. It could be as simple as organizing a water balloon fight in the backyard, or as involved as booking a trip to the museum and making sure everyone has a ride. But no matter the scale, the act of planning it matters. It builds self-esteem. It gives purpose. It shows the guys that their ideas and effort can impact others in a positive way. And in recovery, that sense of purpose is everything.

A Resident at the Last House Sober Living in West Los Angeles playing basketball during a saturday house event.
A Resident at the Last House Sober Living in West Los Angeles playing basketball during a saturday house event.

The camaraderie that grows through these Saturday outings is one of the most important parts of our long-term recovery model. Sober living isn’t just about avoiding relapse—it’s about learning how to live. And no one does that alone. These group experiences create real bonds. The kind that carry over into weekday life. The kind that help someone feel safe enough to share honestly in a group. The kind that get someone to speak up when they’re struggling instead of keeping it to themselves. By laughing together, sweating together, even just hanging out together, we build the kind of trust and loyalty that turns a group of guys into a brotherhood.

There’s also something healing about play. After months or years of pain, burnout, and chaos, it’s a relief to just let loose. To chase a volleyball across the sand. To yell at the TV during a football game. To goof around at a miniature golf course or roast each other over burgers during a backyard cookout. These aren’t childish activities—they’re reminders that joy is allowed. That you can be sober and still feel light. Still feel free. Still feel human.

Our Saturday events also serve as an important accountability tool. Everyone is expected to show up, participate, and be present. It doesn’t matter if someone’s been having a hard week—they’re encouraged to show up anyway. And what often happens is that guys who didn’t feel like joining end up laughing the hardest. They feel better by the end. They feel included. That kind of momentum matters in recovery. When you consistently show up for your peers, you start to show up for yourself.

Over time, these events create a rhythm. Something residents can look forward to. Something they can count on. Structure is vital in early sobriety, especially for those coming from inpatient treatment or chaotic environments. Having a consistent weekly event that blends fun with structure reinforces that life in recovery is both stable and exciting. It helps bridge the gap between the treatment world and the real world. It makes the idea of sober adulthood less scary and more inviting.

Saturday events also become something our alumni remember and cherish. Many of the guys who have graduated from The Last House still talk about their favorite outings. They remember the spontaneous laughter, the awkward attempts at new sports, the moments of connection. These experiences become part of the story they carry with them into long-term recovery. And for those who stay involved with the house after graduation, they often come back to participate or even help plan future events. That sense of continuity reinforces the community aspect of what we do. It turns sober living into a lifelong brotherhood, not just a temporary program.

In a city like Los Angeles, where temptation and distraction are everywhere, creating intentional moments of fun and fellowship becomes even more important. West Los Angeles in particular is filled with nightlife, entertainment, and high-paced living. But there’s also incredible natural beauty, cultural richness, and creative energy. Our Saturday events help residents reconnect with the parts of the city that support their recovery. They get to experience museums, beaches, sports, and community events in a new light. Not as places to party, but as places to grow. Places to live. Places to thrive.

The Last House is not just another Los Angeles sober living home. We are a structured, purpose-driven community that understands the importance of shared experience in recovery. Our Saturday events are not optional add-ons—they are pillars of our program. They help our residents build friendships, take initiative, and rediscover joy. They remind everyone that sobriety is not an end, but a beginning. A beginning filled with laughter, adventure, and real connection.

So whether we’re on the basketball court, swimming in the ocean, or just hanging out in the backyard throwing water balloons, we’re doing more than just killing time. We’re building lives. We’re rebuilding trust. We’re showing up for one another. And we’re proving, every single week, that life in recovery can be exciting, meaningful, and absolutely worth it.

The Last House Sober Living goes for a hike in Los Angeles for a saturday house event.
The Last House Sober Living goes for a hike in Los Angeles for a saturday house event.
The Last House and The Bluffs residents come together to play softball and fellowship during the annual softball tournament.

The Last House’s 6th Annual Softball Tournament Brings the Community Together

This past weekend, The Last House Sober Living hosted its 6th annual softball tournament — and it was one for the books. The energy was high, the sun was out, and the sense of community was stronger than ever.

The Bluffs Women’s Sober Living, The Last House, and The Nook Men’s Sober Living all came out ready to play. Alongside them were Thrive staff, alumni, and even a few families cheering from the sidelines. Everyone was in it together.

What made this year different was the focus on fun and unity. Instead of sticking with the usual teams, we mixed it up and picked teams at random. It wasn’t about winning. It was about connecting. Most of the players already knew each other from other house events like the Cozy Social — a monthly get-together where people in the program come together to check in, share laughs, and build real friendships.

In the weeks leading up to the tournament, the sober livings had been practicing together. It wasn’t just about getting better at softball. It was about showing up for one another. We’d blast music during practice, mess around, and enjoy simply being outside together. That same energy carried through to game day.

Families showed up to support their loved ones and take part in the celebration. There were hugs, high-fives, and plenty of moments that reminded everyone why we do what we do.

This tournament wasn’t just about the game. It was about the people. About showing that recovery can be full of laughter, connection, and joy. That even after everything, we can still come together, play ball, and make some real memories.

Here’s to another year of building each other up — on and off the field.

Congratulations to Team #3 on an awesome win!!

Codependency and Recovery

codependency

Codependency and Substance Abuse:

 

What is codependency?

 

Before defining codependency, it’s important to differentiate dependence from interdependence. Although these terms sound similar, co-dependence is very different. Having needs and comfortably relying (depending) on others is healthy and a part of life. Interdependence is when both individuals mutually rely on each other and the relationship is equal; this is most ideal.

 

Co-dependency (often referred to as “relationship addiction”) occurs when someone relies on the other for meeting nearly all of their emotional and self esteem needs. Two individuals who are overly dependent on one another create a co-dependent union. Often times, co-dependent relationships are one-sided, emotionally destructive and abusive.

 

This emotional and behavioral condition was identified about ten years ago in a study focusing on relationships in families of alcoholics and since then has been identified outside of homes with substance abuse. Co-dependency impairs an individual’s ability to have a healthy and mutually satisfying relationship. This disorder is serious and has profound affects on many.

 

Who is usually co-dependent?

 

Although originally meant to describe someone or their loved ones with a chemical dependency, co-dependency can occur in spouses, children, siblings, friends, co-workers, etc. Often times, co-dependency occurs in dysfunctional families or families with mental illness.

 

There are different roles in co-dependent relationships; one individual is more overly-dependent than the other one, thus creating a care-giver role for the individual that is depended on. The care-giver is often referred to as the rescuer or benefactor. Other roles consist of family hero, mascot, adjustor, doormat, the rebel, scapegoat, bully, lost one, or the last hope.

 

The family hero and the rescuer have similar roles and can identify other’s needs and meet them but is without an understanding of their own needs. The youngest in the family is often times the mascot and uses humor or other things to distract the family away from the problem. The adjuster is never fazed by anything because they never let themselves be too attached to anything or anyone. The doormat is pretty self explanatory and lets other’s take advantage of them by taking most of the abuse.

 

What causes co-dependency?

 

Co-dependency is an inter-generational disorder in which the behaviors are learned by watching and imitating other codependent family members. As stated above, dysfunctional families are more prone to codependency. Dysfunctional families transpire when fear, anger, pain, or shame is experienced but ignored or denied. As a result, some members learn to internalize their own emotions and neglect their own needs and in turn their attention and energy are focused on other members of the family, usually the ill or addicted one. Individuals learn that in order to get the love they want from their family members or loved ones, they must sacrifice their own needs and take care of others instead.

 

Growing up with an unavailable parent will most likely result in co-dependency by the child taking on the role of caretaker and/or enabler. The child may assume responsibility so that the family doesn’t fall apart. When the “parentified” child becomes an adult, they repeat the cycle in their adult relationships.

It’s important for the family and loved ones to be part of this healing process and to understand each of their roles. The Last House Recovery Community and Thrive Treatment  emphasize the importance of family healing as a whole and offers family support.

  

 

What are the symptoms of codependency?

The following behaviors are signs that you are in a co-dependent relationship.

 

  • People pleasing
  • Guilt and perfectionism
  • Difficulty making decisions in your relationships
  • Having poor boundaries
  • Difficulty identifying feelings
  • Extreme or painful emotions that may result in reactivity
  • Denial
  • Difficulty communicating
  • Lack of trust in yourself
  • Poor self esteem
  • Fears of abandonment
  • Obsessions
  • Extreme need for approval
  • A need for control or a sense of responsibility for others’ actions
  • Caretaking
  • Difficulty with intimacy

Co-dependency and substance abuse disorder:

 

Co-dependency is often times a common and understandable reaction to a loved one with an addiction, especially when it is in full swing. Individuals will go into damage control by trying to fix the person or the family. Many times, family members or loved ones think they are helping the situation or the person with the addiction but are in actuality enabling them. Enabling can appear in a number of ways from being in denial of the addiction, not being honest about feelings and needs, or even providing the user with substances. This cycle goes on until something drastic happens like death or hospitalization.

 

Treatment for co-dependency?

 

Recovery from substance abuse and co-dependency usually starts with the user seeking treatment. However, it is just as important for the other loved ones or family members that are co-dependent to seek treatment as well. Individual psychotherapy is very helpful in addition to co-dependency therapy for the members of the dynamic.

Hiking Mt. Whitney Sober

Hiking has been a long time passion of mine. Ever since I have been sober I have developed a strong bond with nature and the outdoors. It is in nature where I have some of the deepest and most inspiring moments in my sobriety. The picture below is an example of one of the awe inspiring scenes that I was privileged to witness while hiking Mt. Whitney.  I love hiking sober.

guitar_lake

My trip up Mt. Whitney was something which required much planning and careful consideration as it is, after all, a hike up the tallest mountain in the contiguous United States. The hike was about 15 miles (counting the long walk in the parking lot, and the various detours that were required during the hike) and rises to a peak elevation of 14,505 feet above sea level.

This hike was a surreal experience. I had always talked about climbing Mt. Whitney with my friends but had never come close to actually following through. The Opportunity arose when a fellow Last House Graduate forced me to enter the lottery which grants Whitney climbing passes. It was by sheer luck that we managed to reserve three spots for the hike in early august- an ideal time to do the hike.

It was even more fortuitous that we were able to make it up to base camp the night before our hiking date because the road leading up to it had been shut down due to a fire. My two friends and I were one of the 20 cars which were escorted through the still smoldering embers during a low point in the fire before it picked up again.

The hike itself began at 10:45pm and ended at around 2:30pm the next day. The hike was grueling and tested my endurance and commitment on several occasions. The most difficult portion of the hike occurred at the summit where my head started to throb as a result of the altitude and I started to feel the onset of altitude sickness. It was through my throbbing eyes that I was able to witness the sunrise from the top of the U.S, one of the most beautiful experiences I have ever witnessed. The view was far greater than anything I had imagined. To my left I could see straight over Death Valley and to my right a stunning view of the high sierras presented itself. The breaking dawn shattered the small lakes and ponds sprinkled throughout the sierras, piercing the calm still waters with streaks of vibrant orange and yellow. I summited before my friends and spent 15 minutes in complete solitude observing the sunrise before snapping a few pictures and hurrying to check on my buddies who were resting below.

My Mt. Whitney experience was made possible through my stay in The Last House and my commitment to being sober. If it were not for my fellow housemate I would not have entered the lottery which got us passes to hike, I would have missed out on an experience I cherish dearly today.

–David S.